Dear Marion,

Hi Suge! It’s me, greenie. Its been awhile since we last spoke Suga Bear. You don’t mind that I call you Suga Bear do you? I mean as much as we go back, you should be cool with my affectionate nickname. I mean, shit… I was down with Death Row from the word go. My domicile may have been on the Eastern seaboard, but lets be honest, back in the early 90s ain’t nann body paid attention to the South, and I was never riding for the Northern team, regardless of our coastal sharing. I was never afraid of you in the way most fans and rappers were. I recall saying aloud once after Pac died, “Fuck a Suge Knight!” and a friend of mine quickly hushing me, lest you hear such foul utterance- in spite of the entire span of the United States distancing us. I may never have actually gotten to west side until i was in my 20s, but thanks to you and the Death Row squad and affiliates, I felt like I spent most of teens there. You put together an umbrella that represented a unified front of west coast thuggery and music.

Well, that’s what you tried to do any way, and for awhile you painted a great picture. Or rather, you scared cats into believing that picture. Then Dre left. Then you killed Pac died. Then Snoop signed to fucking No Limit. No Limit!? Marion!! I mean- what the fuck?? How big of an L did you take when your last living rap god signed to fucking No Limit Records? Respect to P, but hip hop was left scratching its collective head at that bizarre ass signing.

So Death Row crumbled. You went to jail. You got out of jail. You rode a bull… or did you just slap some ho around in a club? I cant call it. I have to admit, I haven’t followed your moves as much as of late. Until my Texas pal Mac Brown, to whom you are one of his thuggerific mentors, who prompted my to go check out the blogfather eskay’s post about your latest activities into reality television.

Ah Suga Bear, Suga Bear, Suga Bear. This time around, the documenting of your pseudo thuggery, from setting afire a G-Unit (isn’t G-Unit beef so two years ago? Go after Dip Set- those pussies need to be knocked the fuck out and run out of rap their bedazzled asses on fire.) (no comment), to have your new henchmen cronies employees chase interviewees around the conference room table to getting themselves chased out of Compton; it just isn’t the same as the mental image my young and fertile mind conjured up of you dangling bastard rappers off of buildings, roughing them up and forcing them to ingest piss-aritas. Its like… its like I don’t believe the malicious and magnificent myth anymore. Its like you’ve gone from being the big bad mofos working in the shadows and scaring little kids and punk rappers with the idea of what you might do, to being that dumb ass bully who never quite grew up because all his glory days were 20 some odd years ago. Oh Suga Bear! I know it hurts! I know if you could go back, you would! You’d be nicer to Dre, you wouldn’t have had Pac killed taken Pac to Vegas, you would have chained Snoop to a recording studio on LA the city not LA the state.

Alas, we cannot move backwards, only forwards. Sadly, it appears your forward motion is rather stagnant. Instead of re-imagining a West Coast Hip Hop scene that deals head on with the new realities of the global rap game, digital face of the music world and creating the new West Coast icons, you are trying to relive glory days that in retrospect weren’t actually that glorious. I mean lets be really real Suga Bear… when you say West Coast rap cats still thing NWA, Snoop, Too Short, E-40. (When cats think weekly freestyle they think Crooked.) Where are the 20 something up and coming left coast MCs? You could have done this! Strangely the Suge Knight brand, on historical myth alone, still means something to rap, but it wont for much longer if this reality show continues to portray you in such a comical old man used to be bully way.

I wish you luck Suga Bear, and I say this with love, so please… no piss-arita thank you drinks necessary next time you touch down in the MIA, it’ll be mojitos on me, well, not literally on me, but, well you know what I mean Suga Bear. Oh, and we can maybe take a yoga class, I don’t want too see you go the way of Pun and die of a heart attack or Big and not be able to run when you someone had him killed. OH! We can invite Dame- he needs a return to Hip Hop too! Gimme a call Marion, lets map this return to rap dominance right.

Sincerely,
your pal,

greenie